You Know You Need A New Lawyer When...

When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five
each other.

During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway.

He tells you that his last good case was a
"Budweiser."

He picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose."

During the trial you catch him playing his Gameboy.

He asks a hostile witness to "pull my finger."

Every couple of minutes he yells, "I call Jack Daniels to the
stand!" and proceeds to drink a shot.

He frequently gives juror No. 4 the finger.

He places a large "No Refunds" sign on the defense table.