[arizona_humor] Have you heard these...............

1. Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony

> > wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

> >

> > 2. Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron."

> > The other says, "Are you sure?"

> > The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."

> >

> > 3. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you,

> > but don't start anything."

> >

> > 4. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

> > A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve

>food

> > in here."

> >

> > 5. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

> >

> > 6. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says:

>"A

> > beer please, and one for the road."

> >

> > 7. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this

>taste

> > funny to you?"

> >

> > 8. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'" "That

> > sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."

> > "Is it common?"

> > "It's Not Unusual."

> >

> > 9. Two cows standing next to each other in a field, Daisy says to Dolly,

>"I

> > was artificially inseminated this morning."

> > "I don't believe you," said Dolly.

> > "It's true - no bull!" exclaimed Daisy.

> >

> > 10. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to

> > look at either.

> >

> > 11. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

> >

> > 12. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed,

>is

> > there anything you can do for him?"

> > "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks

> > the dog up and

> > examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to

> > have to put him down."

> > "What? Just because he's cross-eyed?"

> > "No, because he's really heavy."

> >

> > 13. Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there
are

> > five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mom
or

> > my dad, or maybe my older brother Colin or my younger brother Ho Cha

>Chung.

> > But I'm pretty sure it's Colin.

> >

> > 14. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't

>find

> > any.

> >

> > 15. I went to the butcher's the other day and I bet him 50 bucks that he

> > couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf.

> > He said, "No, the steaks are too high."

> >

> > 16. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,

> > "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!"

> > The doctor replied, "Of course you can't - I've amputated your arms!"

> >

> > 17. I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

> >

> > 18. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly; but when they lit a fire

>in

> > the craft, it sank, proving that you can't have your kayak and heat it

>too.

> >

> > 19. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

> >

> > 20. Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

> >



------------------------ Yahoo! Groups Sponsor --------------------~-->
Make a clean sweep of pop-up ads. Yahoo! Companion Toolbar.
Now with Pop-Up Blocker. Get it for free!
http://us.click.yahoo.com/L5YrjA/eSIIAA/yQLSAA/ZkgolB/TM
--------------------------------------------------------------------~->

Humor Sites

********************************************

If you got this from someone else subscribe at:
Arizona Humor
or send an email to:
arizona_humor-subscribe@yahoogroups.com


Silly Stories
Famous Quotes

Famous Quotes

Funny Quotes


Love Quotes

Yahoo! Groups Links

<*> To visit your group on the web, go to:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/arizona_humor/

<*> To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
arizona_humor-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

<*> Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to:
http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/