arizona humor Next time you have a bad day at work...think of this guy:

Next time you have a bad day at work...think of this guy:


Rob is a commercial saturation diver. He performs underwater repairs on
offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it
to Laughline, who was sponsoring a "worst job experience" contest. Needless to
say, she won. Hi Sue,


Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had bad day
at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I
would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.


Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few
technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea.
I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the water is
quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered
industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the
sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the div
er through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like
a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I
do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it
down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's
like working in a Jacuzzi.


Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So,
of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds
my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage
was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had
sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now since I don't have any hair
on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt
was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was
actually grinding the jellyfish into my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my
dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact
that he, along with 5 other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to
say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in-water
decompression stops totaling 35 minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my
chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing
but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of
laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub
it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but
I couldn't poop for 2 days because my butthole was swollen shut.


So, next time you're having a bad day at work,

think about how much worse it would be if...

you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt!!!



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