Funny Jokes

5.11.2005

Real Estate Bubble - Housing Bubble

Real Estate Bubble - Housing Bubble

Housing Bubble or The Bogeyman Under the Bed
May 11 , 2005 by Steve Mullis


Recently there has been much discussion and speculation about a phrase that sends shivers down the spines of realtors and home owners alike...”The Housing Bubble”.

Having looked at data from a variety of sources and attending a presentation for top named economists, the future of Arizona housing is clearing up nicely.

Developments that can affect the housing market are many...interest rates, employment, population increases or decreases, consumer confidence, the “Housing Affordability Index” the livability index, population age, etc.

...

Housing Bubble

Steve Mullis
Coldwell Banker Success Realty
http://www.stevemullis.com
Email: stevemullis @ cox.net
Mobile: 602-920-9315



Real Estate Bubble

Real Estate Bubble

Bursting the Real Estate Bubble Myth and the Housing Bubble Myth

Real Estate Bubble
Housing Bubble


Sell your Home
Sell Your Own House
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We buy houses. Get fast cash.
Real Estate Investors
Facing Foreclosure

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You Know You Are a Bad Cook When...

You Know You Are a Bad Cook When...
- You use the smoke alarm as a cooking timer.
- You consider it a culinary success if the
pop-tart stays in one piece.
- Your dog goes to the neighbors' to eat.
- Your family buys Alka Seltzer and Kaopectate in bulk.
- When you barbecue, two of your kids hold water guns and the third stands ready by the phone with 911 on speed-dial.
- Your family automatically heads for the dinner table every time they hear a fire truck siren.
- The EPA insists that all your garbage cans be marked with biohazard symbols.
- Your microwave display reads "TILT!"
- Your two best recipes are meatloaf and apple pie, but your dinner guests can't tell which is which.
- Your pie filling bubbles over and eats the enamel off the bottom of the oven.
- You've used three boxes of scouring pads
and a bottle of Drano and a crowbar, and
that macaroni and cheese still won't let go
of the pan.
- Pest control companies keep pestering you for your recipes.
- You make tuna noodle surprise and the surprise is that it glows in the dark and melts the silverware.
- Your family prays AFTER they eat!

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Facing Foreclosure

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5.10.2005

Southerners

Southerners

Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption
fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
_____

Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas,
beans, etc., make up "a mess."
_____

Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of
"yonder."
_____

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is -- as in: "Going to
town, be back directly."
_____

Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the
white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle
of the table.
_____

All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term,
but they know the concept well.
_____

Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a
neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of
cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know
to add a large banana puddin!
_____

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a
right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.
_____

Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a
redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
_____

No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal
is actually going to make a turn.
_____

A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
_____

Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines. We don't do "queues," we
do "lines"; and when we're "in line," we talk to everybody!
_____

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related,
even if only by marriage.
_____

Southerners never refer to one person as "ya'll."
_____

Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
_____

Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are
perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that
fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
_____

When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are in
the presence of a genuine Southerner!
_____

Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the
need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet
milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
_____

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies
who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, "Bless her heart" and go your
own way.
_____

To those of you who're still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two
tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless
your heart!
_____

And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this
Southern stuff, bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on
Southernness as a second language!
_____

And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time,
ya'll need a sign to hang on ya'lls front porch that reads "I aint from the
South but I got here as fast as I could."
_____

Bless your hearts, ya'll have a blessed day.



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5.09.2005

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5.08.2005

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