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1.31.2008

Funny Jokes - Famous Jokes - The IRS and a Rabbi.

Internal Revenue Service sent their auditor to a synagogue. The auditor
does all the checks and then turns to the Rabbi, and says, "I noticed that you
buy a lot of candles."

"Yes," answered the Rabbi.

"Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.

"A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we
have enough, we send them back to the candle maker and every now and then, they

send us a free box of candles."

"Oh," replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question
actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his
obnoxious way... "Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do
with
the crumbs from the matzo?"

"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the
crumbs from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to
the
manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."

"Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi.

"Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the
circumcisions?"

"Yes, here, too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save
up all the foreskins, and when we have enough we send them to the IRS."

" IRS?" questioned the auditor in disbelief. "Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi,
"IRS..and about once a year, they send us a little prick like you."

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1.30.2008

Funny Jokes - Famous Jokes - Fabric Softeners.

Andy Rooney on Fabric Softeners.
My wife uses fabric softene r. I never knew what that stuff was
for.Then I noticed women coming up to me, sniffing, then saying under
their breath, "Married!" and walking away. Fabric softeners are how
our wives mark their territory. We can take off the ring. But, it's
hard to get that April Fresh scent out of your clothes.

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